DRIFT...
Drifter: n. One that drifts, especially a person who moves aimlessly from place to place or from job to job

haven't been gainfully employed since june... was asked what i have accomplished or learnt or gained in these 9 months of unemployment... much has happened... been to 2 mission trips, KL and thailand... spent a tremendous amount of time at home with my mum, went shopping with her last wk and exchanged some gossip... having a well-informed mum isn't so bad after all.

A legacy of love
on 18th Mar 2004, i lost an uncle who was very dear to me, someone whom i felt i owed a large part of my good foundation in studies to... his passing was part of the reason why i lost momentum of writing... he passed away suddenly. old people have a rather pessimistic saying - "poor people are not afraid of death, but are afraid of illness" simply becos the cost of long-term illness is much higher than the cost of a quick death... in his case, this was exactly it...

he suffered a stroke, fainted and was declared brain-dead after on the 3rd evening of his coma. i only managed to visit him on the fourth day, he passed on minutes after i saw him, my aunt said he might have been waiting to see me, we dunno about that, according to the doctor brain-dead patients are no longer conscious to what goes on about them, as good as dead.

he was one of my best teachers, having taught me tuition from primary school till sec 2. he's a very patient man, and had many grateful students. i don't know how often u have non-relatives crying at someone's funeral, but i saw quite a few who did in this funeral. altho he wasn't christian, he left behind a legacy of love. a gentle and soft-spoken man - it was eventually his heavy smoking that killed him. going thru his stuff, i found some teacher's day card from some grateful student who said he's the best teacher he ever had. it was dated many years ago... and i stared at that almost 30 year old typewriter, which he refused to discard... wun b able to hear any more of the "click, click,click, cling!" sounds...

recently i've been thinking a lot about him - how he and my aunt used to babysit me, how he used to make paper kites at home for some extra income, and how he loved to listen to country music, i still remember pleading with him to dub a casette of country music for me when i was in pri 6. he's a great cook... and i love his curry a lot...

but still, some things i thank god for... is that i managed to see him before he stopped breathing. and that he did make a prayer of repentance when he was alive, which is an answered prayer that i've been asking for years... he's with jesus now... and i'm sure he's much happier there

i dunno why i wait till now to write about him, mayb it's jus plain refusal to think about it. but we all need closure... and it doesn't come instantly. still the truth is - u never ever know how much u can miss someone, until u realise u've lost them forever...

from this episode i realise... the meaning of life... no one will ever remember u were alive, unless u've loved them... my uncle left behind a legacy of love, and that's how he is remembered... dearly loved by all those who miss him... still he is my role model, pressing me to leave behind my own legacy of love... to my fellow men...